I want to be artsy enough to say that I’d love to live in this Eliphante sculptural home. But I’m not. The photos are intriguing and I’m sure it would be a fantastic place to visit, but I just couldn’t live there. Because I have this affinity for, you know, straight lines and, ummmm, indoor plumbing. I mean, I like Tim Burton as much as the next person, but I don’t want to live in one of his movies 24/7.
Add comment January 31st, 2008
Here’s something your tile man doesn’t want to hear after he’s 3/4 of the way finished tiling your new shower:Â Â
“but, ummmm, hey, what about the little corner shower shelves and the soap dish?” Â
Oops. Swear, swear, swear.Â
Otherwise, the basement construction is coming along well. Be back soon.Â
Add comment January 31st, 2008
We’ve discussed my love for Jonathan Adler time and again. So let’s just get to it.
JA has a new line of goods out at Barnes & Noble. On the one hand, I do NOT need another excuse to run into B&N. The lure of the magazine section alone will do that. But I do so *heart* me these bookends that a trip may be in order. Can I escape with just the bookends? Absolutely not. Can I escape with the bookends and maybe only four magazines? Perhaps.
(note to self: I know it alarms you to see this picture and the self-doubt it raises in that you apparently have been using book ends incorrectly your entire life. Apparently we’re supposed to leave the flat end out, not weighted down with books? Because flimsy sheet metal will hold up 400 tons of books by itself. Especially if the logo is properly placed for everyone to see…)
Add comment January 24th, 2008
I needed to go to the store yesterday so  I asked the four year old what kind of “regular week cereal” she’d like for breakfast. “Regular Week Cereal,” as opposed to “Saturday Cereal,” the difference being that I can only stand to be around three hopped-up children one morning a week and not seven.Â
She had a particular cereal in mind but she couldn’t remember the name. She described it for me several times, ending up with “it’s like those grapey things, but smaller and like sticks — little sticks that are brown and smaller than Grape Nuts.” I think and think and think and finally it comes to me. My child wants me to buy her All-Bran.Â
Oh, did I say that she’s four? I meant 84. Gives new meaning to “regular week cereal” though, doesn’t it?
Add comment January 24th, 2008
My inner nerd wants to ship $60 off RIGHT NOW for this hand-knit frog dissection on Etsy.
I *love* this. Like only a person who spent half of their seventh-grade lunch periods dissecting frogs and starfishes and fetal pigs can love a thing. And I want to pass that weird, morbid appreciation on to my son… by giving him soft cuddly amphibian innard artwork.
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2 comments January 23rd, 2008
Ok, so these Safety Tats have been making the blog rounds the past few days. They’re temporary tattoos you put on your kids when you go to large public places like airports or amusement parks. You write a phone number on the tattoo and then when your kid gets lost, someone will be able to get Junior back to you.
It’s a brilliant idea. No, really. But I’ll give you another brilliant idea that we use every time we go to those child-losing type places. It’s called “just write the number on your kid’s arm.” I tend to use a Sharpie because I always have one with me. I do not always have a set of $20 kid tattoos, along with a damp washcloth for application with me. I do not have time for this shit. Do you? No. You remember as you’re leaving the van (or standing in line at the security gate) that you need to scribble something on your kid, you do it, people look at you in abject horror (except that one wide-eyed mom who’s thinking “She’s. brilliant!”) and you move on with life.
Go ahead and draw a butterfly too if you really feel you must.
4 comments January 22nd, 2008
you know, my license to parent. Or they should. Because Friday is Movie Night here and, instead of going to rent a movie, the girls picked one on tv. On Disney Channel. Bleh.
Everyone was settling in but when we went to turn it on, it started an hour later than we had originally thought. Luckily, there was another movie just starting and I told them, “You guys watch this one and if you like it, we’ll keep it on. If not, we’ll switch over when yours starts.” Ok, crisis averted.
So the stand-in movie was Ghostbusters. GHOSTBUSTERS! They’ll have to love Ghostbusters, right?! They’ll never want to go back and watch that other sappy Disney inaneness, right?! Wrong. So we switch it to Disney. But we continued to switch back and forth during the commercial breaks. And we were coming up near the end of Ghostbusters where the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man appears and they wanted to switch back to their movie.
What?! “But this is where the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man is!” I scream.
“What’s that?” they say.
“A marshmallow man. A GIGANTIC MARSHMALLOW MAN. And he’s about to be BLOWN UP!”
Their response? Eh. “Turn it back to Disney!”
What? WOT?! My children picked freakin’ High School Musical 2 over Ghostbusters?! Oh, no… oh, my heart!
And so, rather than argue and listen to shrieky little girls for the next 15 minutes, I switched it back to HSM2 (see that? “HSM2″ Bleh. I’m ashamed to know the Disney parlance). I fully expected super stealth ninjas to drop from the ceiling on ropes and bundle me away, you know to save the children. Because obviously somewhere I screwed up. Very, very badly.
3 comments January 20th, 2008
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Can’t WAIT to see the Indexed book, which is now available for preorder. If you haven’t checked out the blog yet, do so now as it’s one of the more hilarious things on the web. No, no fat ol’ cats pretending to type on a computer or eat spaghetti — I mean REALLY funny. You know, like as funny as economics can be.
Add comment January 18th, 2008
I can’t believe that Threadless didn’t print the “I’m Sure I Used to Fit” shirt in kids’ sizes. Wh-what?! My boy NEEDS one of these!
2 comments January 16th, 2008
Love — LOVE! — this set of mood bottle openers. In fact, they’re in the running for position as my *favorite* bottle openers (did you know such a competition even existed?!), currently neck-and-neck with Alessi’s Diabolix.
Ooohh, so hard to choose. Shiny metal things are always enticing but those Alessis do come in pretty, pretty colors. And they’re PLASTIC!Â
Anthropomorphic bottle openers… my drug of choice. Even though I cannot remember the last time I actually needed this sort of help opening a bottle.    Â
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1 comment January 16th, 2008
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